Step 9: F.E.A.R.!

READ IT

I’ve already talked to you about growing up in South Dakota. Grew up on the farm, and besides working with hay, there were times we also had the “opportunity” (that’s what my dad would tell us when there was work to do . . . that we had a great opportunity!) to clean out grain bins in the late spring and early summer. The job consisted of shoveling the grain out that the auger couldn’t pick up. It was a hot, dusty, grueling job. Each time my older brother, cousin and I began the task, we each took the chore on with fears that went along with it.

My 6’2”, 250 lbs cousin had a fear. He was claustrophobic, and feared the closed in space with only a small door for his exit. My fear, and I know this sounds funny coming from a 6’2”, 270 lb person, was of the hundreds of rodents, the mice and rats, that had found their homes in the bin during the winter. As we would shovel, our new little friends would scamper everywhere; around the bin, out the door, up our pant legs! I still get goose-bumps as I write about the event. My older brother, who is 5’10” and 170 lbs also had a fear. He explained that his fear was when my cousin or I were unable to face our fears and decided we needed to escape from the bin as fast as possible, that that he might be standing in front of the small door in the way of our retreat!

When we get together and talk about the old times, we talk about the fears we had when we entered that “scary” situation. In all the times we cleaned out the bin, the bin never swallowed up my cousin, no rodent ever got the best of me, and even though he had many close calls, my brother was never (seriously!) hurt! The fears we experienced were, as the book, “The Aladdin Factor” says, were Fantasized Expectations Appearing Real!

In all we do, in every stage of our lives, we all have certain F.E.A.R. that we come into contact with. The problem is when we allow the fantasized expectations to stop us in our tracks or to halt our progress. Eleanor Roosevelt said that “The danger lies in refusing to face the fear, in not daring to come to grips with it…You must do the thing you thing you cannot do.”

“Do the thing you fear to do and keep on doing it…that is the quickest and surest way ever yet discovered to conquer fear”, is what Dale Carnegie’s advice is. On your path up your performance edge steps, is there something you fear? If so, you are not alone. Did you know that most people, after eight weeks of working on a goal, get off track. They say it’s because they start to fear the next steps that they need to take to continue on their path to success. Is there anything that you may fear? Do you need to step up your program to a new level? If you have an obstacle in front of you, can you tackle it? Remember fear is conquered by action. Once you dare face the things that scare you, you open the door to freedom. Once you can put aside your fear you will move ahead and your dreams won’t be a nightmare, they will become your successful reality.

DO IT

1. Take the time over the next few days and write out some of your fears. Maybe it’s that if you lose weight, you’ll have to spend money on a new wardrobe. If you’re very committed to that new group or organization, maybe you have some doubts and fears that you won’t spend as much time with your old friends? In both situations, maybe you have a fear that people who were in your life before won’t treat you the same. Maybe it’s the fear that if you don’t reach your goal, you’ll have to face the folks that know the steps you’ve taken so far. Whatever they are, write them out.
2. On the paper, next to each fear, put down the worst case scenario of what could happen. If you did lose the weight and needed to spend money on clothes, what is the worst thing that could happen; you would incur debt and be put out on the street? With your new group; your old friends would abandon you and you would end up with no friends and need to move to the mountains to live a life of seclusion? We laugh, but lay out the worst situation that you can think of.
3. Now, look over the fears. Is the situation you put down likely to happen? If you think that FEAR is a reality – go back to Step 4 and lay out a game plan to handle the situation before it comes up. Maybe you start talking with you new healthy friends and see when they are having a garage sale. You set up a meeting with your old friends for a little get together and ask them to get involved in your new organization. Set up a game plan to see your fear and attack it!